Just another WordPress weblog
I’m beginning to wonder if I should have called this the “ClutterBlog” or “BodyClutter” instead. I realized recently how all the clutter in my house and ON ME come from the same place in my brain. I think it all has the same source.
Weigh in this week was same as last week 186. No, I haven’t given up. Yes, I realize I’m not doing the right things. Today is day #1 again.
nuff said.
Well, how many weeks am I in now? 8?!!! and ZERO progress.
It’s time I admit to myself the truth. I have not been trying hard enough. Who the hell works at losing a few measly lbs for 8 weeks and nothing to show for it? nobody. Oh wait, me!
1. Do you think you’ll continue to perform RAOK throughout the rest of the year?
Although I don’t get much opportunity, I will definitely try.
2. Are you involved with a volunteer group? What sort of things do you plan to do this year to “give back” and help others?
I’m not involved in any, I’m afraid. No time, Really. I think my acts of kindness this year will need to be directed at my own siblings and family.
3. What support network do you have around you? Are you in regular contact with family and friends?
This is the reason I want to concentrate on my own family. We need to reconnect because my siblings and I are each living in a different state and I have not spoken to them as often as we should.
4. Do you see yourself as a positive or negative person? What might you change to be more positive?
I’m positive from 7am to 4pm and negative from 4 to the kids’ bedtime. I noticed my mood got far better when I started to exercise. I think I’ll stick with what works for now.
5. What tasks have significant meaning in your life? Who in your life do you influence with your support, words, time and actions?
I think I influence my sister and brother and coworkers to some extent.
Undoubtedly part of my problem with eating is my habit of picking bites out of my daughter’s meals. It’s not that big of a problem, though. I really don’t do it often. But today I guess I was “bad”. Really.
After dinner I let Jada take a lunchable out of the fridge. She didn’t eat much at dinner so I figured she could use it but being the picky slow eater that she is, she ate a few slices of the bologna and left it on the coffee table. I took a chocolate chip cookie when she wasn’t looking. She didn’t notice. Then after another 10 minutes she went off playing with the dogs and I started eating the crackers. She hopped back (because she rarely just walks) and saw that some of the crackers were missing. She said “That’s miiiine” and moved the little plastic tray to a spot farther away from me on the coffee table .
So she ate one cracker and then took off again with the block of cheese (because she never separates the cheese) and disappeared into the bedrooms. After a while I thought she had forgotten about it so I ate the second cookie and a couple more crackers. I left one lonely cracker in the tray.
Then, to my dread, she skipped back to the living room and reached out for the tray expecting to still have her cookie and crackers there. When she looked down and saw all that was missing, her hand froze in midair and she said “heeeeey!”. Being good roll model that I am, I quickly blamed it on the dogs. I said “the dogs ate it!”. She looked at the dogs for a second and said “Stop! Stop it, mommy!! Stop ..eating!”.
I laughed because this is the first time she caught me in a lie. The dog excuse had always worked on her before! She’s getting too smart for my own good. After a minute or two she sat down on the couch next to me waiting for star trek to finish so I could put Wubbzy on. I thought I had been forgiven but after a few more minutes of silence she lowered her voice to a mumble and said, “that’s bad mommy. Bad.” I looked at her and said “what’s bad?” She said with a disappointed-in-you tone “… my lunchables…..”
Big surprise, eh? That I would yet again have zero weight loss. Sigh…
I started to log my food again today. I don’t know why I’ve been finding it so hard to remember to do it. I just get caught up in everyday tasks and, before I know it, it’s 9pm and too late because by then I can’t remember what I’ve eaten. Is this like sabatoging myself ? whatever.. I’ll put some extra effort in it today.
I decided not to take measurements today because something is telling me I won’t like what I see. I thought by this stage in the game I’d be ready to take my second set of photos. Oh well.
1. How do the people that you sent a post card to inspire you? How have they made an impact on you?
I don’t have three but two people who have been a big influence on me. Two guy friends I really am very lucky for having. The first I met in college and we’ve known eachother for about 15 years now, the other I’ve known for about 8 years now. The first taught me how to argue. LOL! and made me admit a few things about myself I probably otherwise would not have. The next let me know (at a time when I needed to hear it) that I am attractive and a special person outside and in.
2. What clutter do you see in your home that you would like to see reorganized? How do you feel when you see it?
EVERYTHING needs to be reorganized. It makes me feel good. LOL!. Well it really makes me feel sad but I feel good because I know it will all change soon.. as soon as I get my pda sync’d up to vista. :) (just another excuse)
3. Is there some emotional clutter in your mind that continues to resurface? Where is it coming from? Does the situation still hold as much value?
Yes, I think the clutter in my mind reflects on my clutter in my house and vice versa too. Who can think straight with that much chaos in the house?! I don’t know where it comes from . Probalby from the same laziness that got me 40 lbs heavier than I was just 4 years ago.
4. Is there someone in your life who you need to share your feelings with concerning an “old” situation? Would it benefit you best to face it, or maybe just forgive and forget it?
What is meant by “old” situation? Weight? my laziness maybe? I have nobody to share it with but myself. It’s my own doing.
5. Are you opening yourself to your new lifestyle? Are you processing and FEELING your emotions better than before? How does the “ideal” you handle conflict or stressful situations?
I’m feeling much happier and empowered than ever before since I’ve started to take action for myself. The ideal me would brush certain things off. I still do.
Barack Obama News
Who the hell am I?
I'm a mother of two,
wife of one,
pet owner of four.
My name is Tania.
And this is my blog.
Add a Comment